I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
