Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
i think im in europe. pls send help
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