god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
