Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
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