Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
