It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
