You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
