dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
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