You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
