All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
