i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize