plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
