After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
