Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize