it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Randomize
