just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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