Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
