Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
