Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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