ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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