how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize