I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
