next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
