Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize