Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
