Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Randomize
