We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
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