He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
