I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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