i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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