You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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