I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
