who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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