He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
