: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
you made out with another girl for some wings
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
