He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Randomize
