I think I am morally bankrupt
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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