sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
