well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize
