Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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