I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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