Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
