Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
