No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Randomize
