so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I think your dad took our porno
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
And then my night got REAL pukey
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
