Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
