i just had sex bonerless
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
