haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
So apparently I’m into choking now
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
