we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
