Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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