Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
